Monday, August 31, 2009


What is happiness?  Have you ever given any thought to this question?  Happiness, I believe, is finding joy in each & every moment.  I think the problem that many of us have is going "in search of" happiness.  It's an idea that's been with our country from the very beginning, after all right in the Declaration of Independence "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness."

Happiness isn't to be pursued, it's to be enjoyed.  If you're always looking for happiness you'll never find it.  Way to many of us make statements like; "When I get that new job, then I'll be happy." or "When I get married, then I'll be happy." we set ourselves up to delay what we can have right now.

Yes, the idea that happiness is enjoying every moment is a simple answer but truly it's the only way to discover what you're pursuing.  In actuality, happiness is living from your soul.  The closer we get to reconnecting with our "true self" or our "divine self" the happier we'll be.  We all have it within us to have anything we want.  God/universe only knows unlimited giving.  The problem is that we let our EGO dictate what we want or need to be happy.  This is rarely what we really need, as we discussed a while ago the EGO lies.  It only wants the things that will satisfy the EGO not what will satisfy the soul.  To find true happiness we need to rediscover our divinity....we have to find out who we truly are!

Live from the soul, reconnect with your source & find happiness in every moment of every day!

Till Tomorrow,


Quote of the day: "Happiness isn't something to pursue, it's something to enjoy in every moment of everyday! Be happy & live in the now." 

Friday, August 28, 2009

Outside Observer

One of the best ways to continue your growth to a more joyful life is to become an "Outside Observer" of your life.  What does being an "Outside Observer" mean?  To me it means learning to step away from each situation in your mind & look at it objectively.  We talked a lot about life being filtered through your own perceptions a few weeks ago.  To me, after realizing you are filtering everything, the next step is to learn to be objective in each situation.

This is not an easy step but with practice it can make a big difference.  You can describe this process however you'd like.  Some people may just call it being objective, Deepak Chopra calls it the "Silent Observer" for me "Outside Observer" works best because for me the process is exactly that, stepping away from yourself & looking at the situation in a different light.

So the first question you need to answer is can you be objective with your own thoughts & actions?  This is the hardest part of this idea because even when you think you may be objective you truly may be hung up on your own perceptions.  I don't have an easy answer as to how to become better at this, I can only share with you the process I go through with any conversation/situation I am involved in.

The first thing I do is try to understand why the other person is saying/acting the way they are.  Remember that each us reacts from our own experiences & more often then not we react to most situations by coming from a place of fear.  We're afraid of what we feel are weaknesses in our own life or we're reacting from fear because of a past event that mirrors the feeling of the situation that's happening in-front of us.  Once we understand this key piece we can begin to understand how to help move the situation away from fear into a positive environment.

The next thing I do is look at my reaction to the situation & try & understand what my motivation is.  I am reacting out of fear, am I annoyed because this person is "reflecting" a quality back to me that I don't like about myself?  For most people this may be the hardest part of the process, I know it is still hard for me.  The easiest way I've learned to be able to follow this process is to slow things down in my mind, take a breath & take the time to truly listen.

Once you're able to be the "Outside Observer" in your own life you'll begin to hear the messages that God/universe wants you to learn from each situation.  By beginning to learn the messages of everyone that enters your life you will begin to have more & more snychronistic occurrences in your life.  The more open & objective you can be in your life the easier it will be to find more joy!

Hope you all have a great weekend, Till Monday!


Quote of the day: "By being the "Outside Observer" in your own life you'll learn to become more open & accepting.  This openness will lead you to more joy!"

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Quieting the Noise

Yesterday we talked about being patient in the storm around you & enjoying each moment regardless of the circumstances.  I think we need to explore the bigger idea here.  In this day & age we are surrounded by way to many distractions, there is "noise" everywhere we go.  In my opinion to much noise.  I think technology is a wonderful thing but it has made us all accessible 24/7 and it creates an atmosphere of distraction.  Remember when you were a child & you had "quiet time" where not much was going on?
Where you explored your imagination & created wonderful ideas.

I think we all need to try & slow down our busy lives & quiet the noise in our life.  As I mentioned before I'm not good at meditation but I do try to give myself "quiet time" each day to reflect on my life & my intentions for the day & for my life.  I try to take this quiet time at least a couple of times a day.  

But let's talk a bit more about "quieting the noise".  In order to truly bring synchronicity back into your life & improve the possibilities for your intentions to be heard by God/universe we need to quiet the noise in our life & relearn how to narrow our focus.  To some people this may be a contradiction to opening up & being accepting to everything that comes into your life.  I don't see it that way at all, I have found in my life that the things I need to pay attention to make themselves known to me.  You'll learn over time what or who you need to pay attention to, trust in the universe.

How do you narrow your focus?  Have you ever been so engrossed in a book that nothing can distract you?  Well the idea behind narrowing your focus & quieting the noise isn't that extreme but it should be an idea that you explore.  Focus on what is important to you & what makes its self apparent to you.  Quiet the other noise & take time to be quiet yourself.  Learn to slow life down & enjoy it, savor it like a good wine or a great meal.  All we have is today nothing else is guaranteed, remember that when a day seems to get difficult, there's always a way to enjoy even those tough days. Together we'll find a way to enjoy each day and find the joy!

Till tomorrow,


Quote of the day: "Quiet the noise & narrow your focus, joy is all around you.  Find the joy & eliminate the noise!"

Wednesday, August 26, 2009


I observed many things on my vacation to England, I tried to live in each moment &  I related to a wide variety of people.  Through all of this one of the things that rang very true to me is patience.  How much patience do you have?  Do you have patience for people that are different then you? or do you just dismiss them?  In a storm of activity can you remain calm and move through the storm as a quiet force?

These & many more questions are very difficult for some people to answer.  Let's take it a step further & ask, is your outside appearance the same as how you feel inside?  Patience can be a very difficult thing in this busy time.  I believe it's something we all need to work on especially now.

We talked a lot in the past in this journey to joy about appreciating each moment, patience to me is very interconnected to this.  I have always been thought of as someone who has great patience.  Patience in teaching, patience in listening & patience in waiting, my struggle is that inside I'm not always as patient as I appear on the outside.

I've wrote some about my daughter's wedding, it was an amazing experience to me & something I think every father of a little girl should go through.  The range of emotions that you experience in a short period of time (if you allow them) is amazing.  But, there was a storm of activity.  This storm was complicated by the wide variety of people involved in this wedding, from grandma's fairly set in their ways to my ex-wife to a couple not even invited to the wedding (that's another story) to the few friends of my daughter & son-in-law's friends & to my son-in-laws very British parents.  I enjoyed the differences that each of these people brought to this wonderful event but I found everyone getting caught up in the storm & not truly appreciating what we all were there for.

I was able to move from group to group & bring some calm to each situation that presented its self.  I calmed down people upset at small things beyond their control & brought some calmness to people that were stressed out by everything happening around them.  The point of this blog is not to commend myself because as I mentioned earlier I struggle with what's going on on the inside as opposed to what people see in these situations.  Instead I want to give an example of how life can pass you by if you don't slow down.  This amazing event was a blink in the lifetime of everyone who attended it but many of the people didn't appreciate the experience because they were caught up in the storm.

Patience is letting go of the outcome, enjoying the now & quieting the storm.  To truly have patience you must be open to the differences of the people in your life & accept them from where they are coming from.  All of these traits are part of your expansion into a more joyful life.  So today when the storm begins around you, take a breath & be the calm....your life will change because of it.

Until tomorrow,


Quote of the day: "Patience is the ability to calm the storm around you & appreciate each & every moment, practice patience today!"

Monday, August 10, 2009


Do you always tell the truth?  What does it take for you to tell a lie?  Are you honest to yourself? These are all difficult questions, did you take time to think of your answers?  If not it a minute now and think through these questions. 

What does honesty have to do with bringing more joy in your life?  I think it has everything to do with it.  Why?, because honesty like so many other great qualities opens you up to more great things in your life.  To me honesty is the basis of it all, especially being honest to yourself.  The only way to grow & learn in your life is to be truly honest with yourself.  So many people go through their lives trying to hide their weaknesses, not just from others but from themselves.

I've always trusted in being honest, to myself & to everyone in my life.  Heidi (my wife) will tell you at times I'm bluntly honest.  I've learned in my life to soften some of the bluntness but if someone asks me a direct question I'm going to answer them openly & honestly.

The universe/God only knows the truth, so truly who do you think you're fooling?  You may be fooling people in your life & you may even be able to fool yourself for a while.  But, is it worth it?  Be open & honest to yourself & everyone in your life.  Let go of the negative behavior of lying.  Accept responsibility for your actions & be true to yourself.  Start today & your life will change.

For all of you that don't know; I'll be in England starting tomorrow for my eldest daughters wedding on Friday 8/14.  The blog will be taking a break for the next two weeks while I'm away.  I'll try & post travel updates here & maybe some pictures when I can get internet access.  This is a great time to re-read the blog from the beginning,  I look forward to all of your questions & comments on my return.  I'll miss you all till then.



Return date will be 8/25!

Quote of the day: "Honesty is the key to positive changes in your life.  Be honest with yourself & everyone you meet & the world will be honest in return."

Friday, August 7, 2009


So what do you think about Destiny?  There has been many writings over the years about Destiny.  They range from the belief that everything in our life is predetermined to the belief that everything in our life is self determined.  Where on the scale do you stand?  Have you even given the subject much thought? Throughout my life I've thought a lot about this subject & although this subject isn't directly related to living a more joyful/positive life for me it's all interconnected.

I believe we at our source are energy & as we've discussed before that energy is interconnected with everything in the universe.  We can & do have an affect on everything in the universe because we are all energy & that energy is sent out from us by our thoughts & actions. So is everything in life predetermined?  I don't believe in absolute predetermination. I believe instead that the intelligence of God/Universe gives us a path that we suppose to follow but God/Universe also gives us choices along that path.

The God/Universe will try to bring us back onto our path predetermined path in life by self correcting the path we have chosen but if we are not open & accepting we will continue to choose the wrong path.  Many times, as we've discussed, these wrong choices are driven by our EGO.  We decide that we want more money, more possessions or more fame and ignore our true path in life. 

From the time we are born, into this human form, our soul is searching to return to our Source.  Our Source is the divine attachment we have to God/Universe.  It's the small voice that hear we when we actually listen deep inside us.  This Source only knows positive energy & the fulfillment of what we ask for.  When we can connect to this Source while we are alive we are truly fulfilled & everything works the way it should in our life.  Our journey in life is to be reconnected with our Source.  We don't have to wait until we die to reconnect, if we live a more joyful life & listen to our soul we can reconnect in our lifetime.  

Whatever your thoughts on Destiny/Fate the more you open up to the God/Universe the more joyful life you will lead.

Until Monday,


Quote of the day: "Our destiny is a choice we make everyday.  Choose to be open & accepting & joy will fill your life."

Thursday, August 6, 2009


"I love to laugh, loud & long & clear"(video below) Yes I do love to laugh & I woke up this morning with this song for mary Poppins in my head so I decided it's a great thing to talk about.  The benefits of laughter are incredible. According to Ode magazine's August Issue from an article entitled "The Medicine of Mirth" by Mary Desmond Pinkowish "Laughter blunts stress & pain; hearty chuckling increases levels of the "happy" brain chemicals known as endorphins.  Laughter staves off black moods, which can damage heart health & increase the risk of stroke.  It reduces levels of cortisol, the stress hormone that's tied to several health problems, including deposition of fat in abdominal area, the most dangerous place for it.  Laughter can ease anxiety disorders, while breast milk of mothers who laugh hard contains higher levels of melatonin, which can reduce the chances of eczema in newborns.  Laughter may also mitigate the damaging effects of inflammation, a process linked to heart attacks, arthritis, allergies & other conditions.  The progress of diabetic kidney disease may be stymied by laughter, and laughter is linked to better respiratory function in those with chronic lung disease.  Best of all, you burn more calories when you laugh." 

Wow, I didn't know all of that, =D  I just knew laughter was good for you & we all need to do more of it.  Laughter is also a great social event, we tend to laugh more in groups. If we can all laugh a little more each day we'll brighten our mood and the mood of everyone around us.

I've never been afraid to laugh, whether in a play or a comedy club I'm happy to laugh anytime I think something is funny, even if I end up laughing by myself.  The old adage "laughter is the best medicine" is really true.  Bring more joy to your life through laughter!!

Till tomorrow,


Quote of the day: "Laughter brightens the soul, find time to laugh & bring more joy to the world!"

"I Love to Laugh"

Wednesday, August 5, 2009


Wow, here's a big topic that we've touched on here & there over the past month but I think we should plunge into all the way! Your perception affects everything in your life. It's the most important subject to to truly become aware of.

Let's start with the definition: " the act or faculty of apprehending by means of the senses or of the mind; cognition; understanding." Everything we know in life is filtered through our own perception. Our perception is developed throughout our life by the experiences we've had & the knowledge we've learned. The only way to change your life to a more joyful life is to change your perception of everything. Yes, I know that sounds like a big task, but actually it's just an effort, on your part, to look at things differently.

No matter how objective you think you are in life. Everything is affected by your perception & to complicate things a little more, everything you read, hear or see is someones else's perception which you then interpret through your own perception. So everything in life is filtered to some extent at least twice (1st by who's saying it & 2nd by your own).

What happens over our life is that we tend to get entrenched in the way we perceive things & this leads us to seeing things in the same pattern we've always known. The problem with this is that if we want to change our life we need to break these old patterns & look at things differently to begin to find more joy.

So how do we start to do this? There's no defined way it's whatever seems to work for you. What I've done over the past several years is to challenge myself to look at everything differently. I allow the 1st thought into my head & recognize it. I then challenge myself to look at it from at least one other point of view. The next step for me when it comes to other people is to not judge. I let go of all my preconceived ideas of what a person is I don't judge them by what they are wearing, what their appearance is what race or religion (if I know) or what sexual preference. I instead try to understand why they are saying what they are saying. In other words I try to understand their point of view, their perception of what they are telling me.

I believe strongly that every person that comes into your life is there for a reason. This reason is usually to teach something you need to know. Either something about yourself (as talked about in "reflections") or something you need to know to move forward in your life. If you try to open yourself up to this idea you begin to see the world in a different way.

For me the final step is to also look at everything else in your life (that's not people) in the same open (new) way. We can discover messages from everything that enters our life....everything is there for a reason! That's the way the universe works. (To learn more about the meaning of animals that show up in your life a great book is "Animal Speaks" by Ted Andrews).

Change your perception & your new life will begin to unfold in front of you.

Until tomorrow,


Quote of the day: "Perception is your filter of the universe. Change your perception & the world will change around of you!"

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Fear of the unknown

A few weeks ago we discussed fear & the need to move past the fear in our life to have a more joyful life.  In the past couple of weeks I've been confronted by people in my life with a very specific fear & in fact the fear that holds most people back, that's the fear of the unknown.

What is the fear of the unknown?  To me it's just a big lie.  It's our mind playing tricks on us.  Here's what happens; we have something that's going to happen in a few days that we're concerned about like a doctors appointment.  We've had some tests previously & something has shown up that requires more testing so we have to return to the doctor.  In our minds, inbetween the appointments we start to envision more & more bad things that could be wrong with us.  The fear within us regarding this appointment grows & grows even though we have no information that  supports what we're thinking.  

What happens is we get consumed by this fear, no matter what we do, every free thought we have creates a different or deeper problem that's going to occur.  This can happen with anything in our life that occurs "later" and that we have some concern about.  This "fear of the unknown" takes away from living in the current moment as we are instead obsessed with the future event.  Besides not living in the current moment we move our thoughts to a more & more negative place.  This fear for some people can be very crippling & the truth is the imagined fear rarely if ever happens.

So what do we do to get past this overwhelming fear?  What I've always done is first & foremost live in the current moment.  This alone will save us from most of the fear.  If we are only focused on the now & enjoying the current moment we don't have time to create a fear of something that's going in the future.

The second way I deal with this "fear" is to clear my mind when the thought comes into it & then replace the thought with a positive thought of something that's happening right now.  So it works something like this using the example above: The thought is I could be really sick otherwise the doctor wouldn't be running all these tests.  I clear my mind and concentrate on my breathing and let go of all thoughts including the "negative thought".  I then replace the thought with something in the current moment....."Look how beautiful my wife is looking in that outfit!"  If you're able to do this with any negative thought you will begin to move past these thoughts & live a more joyful life.

Until tomorrow,


The quote of the day: "The fear of the unknown is in fact an illusion, let go of the fear & live in the now!"

Monday, August 3, 2009


I was reminded this weekend about a couple of guys from Purdue University that spend every Wednesday giving out compliments.  (I'll attach a Youtube video at the end).  The idea behind this started very simply.  They wanted to do something to brighten people's day.  So what they decided to do is to go the a heavy traffic place at Purdue every Wednesday & give out free compliments.  Now they have been recognized throughout the country for this very simple idea.

So why I am I writing about these guys here?  I see it as two fold: 1st) It shows how each one of us can have a large impact on everyone that enters our live by doing a small thing. 2nd) I think it's a great idea.  I think people have forgotten to compliment people in their lives anymore.  We get so caught up in our own lives & so caught up with our expectations of others that compliments aren't something that easily comes to our minds. 

For these guys it doesn't matter who you are when you walk by they find something to give you a compliment on.  The impact they've had on the campus of Purdue can't be measured.  But from the responses they've received the impact has been unbelievable.  People who were having a bad day had their day improve just by this simple act.

So, today let's all remember to pay the people in our lives a compliment.  Let's start a small change in the world that can make a big difference!

I appreciate everyone who reads this blog.  You have chosen to try & take simple steps to help change your life.  Spread the joy of compliments to everyone in your life today!

Until tomorrow,


PS I love to hear from all of you either here or on twitter.  If there's a subject that's important to you feel free to let me know & I'll try & write about.  If you have specific questions I'll also try & address them.

Quote of the Day: "A compliment can change a persons day.  Give everyone in your life the joy of a compliment today!  Change the world!"