Emotions

We've talked a lot about different emotions over the past few months & we've particularly focused on the negative emotions that hold us back from having a more joyful life. I've tried to show you ways to work through these negative emotion to bring your life to a more positive/joyful place.  As we move forward on this journey to joy it's important to understand that we need to accept all of our emotions, even the negative ones as part of who we are.

As we grow to accept who were are & love ourselves where were at right now.  We need to allow ourselves to feel all of our emotions.  They are all part of who we are & although we want to minimize the negative emotions in our life, we have to accept them when we feel them.  Try to understand where the emotions are coming from, whether good or bad.  When we understand the reason we're reacting the way we do, we get to know ourselves much better.  Sometimes these emotions, good or negative, can be very deep seated from something that's happen in your life before.  The situation that you are experiencing at the moment may not be the same situation that happen in your past but it makes you feel the same way.  It's this connection to your feelings that's important to note.

By understanding the "why" of emotions we can minimize the impact of the negative emotions in our lives.  Sometimes these negative emotions serve us well, like Fear!  Although we don't want to live from a place of fear, (& far to many of us do) if you were in a situation where we should be in fear it does serve us well.  All of our emotions are important & they are all part of who we are.  Celebrate each of them & grow in your knowledge of yourself when you experience them.

You are a compilation of everything you've experienced in your life. Accept all the different parts of you including all of your emotions.  Grow & understand each part of yourself & you will lead a more joyful life.

Till Monday, have a great weekend.

Bill

Quote of the day: "Accept & experience all the emotions you have, for each emotion is a window into who you are." 


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Admitting you're wrong

One of the hardest things for many of us to do is to admit when we're wrong.  The world today is filled with people who have gone out of their way to cover up their mistakes rather then admit them & move on.  This is especially true in the workplace where, for the most part, we are literally afraid to admit we made a mistake. 

Why is it that we can't admit we wrong? Why do we dig in our heels to defend ourselves even when we know in our heart we're wrong.  The number one answer for this is the world we live in today.  We have unfortunately moved away from the idea that trying things out to find what you're good at it or what you want to do is not acceptable anymore.  We now have to be successful immediately.  There is no room in our society to try & fail.  I'm truly not sure if a man like Thomas Edison would have succeeded in the world today.  One of my favorite quotes from him is: "I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work."  can you imagine someone today saying that?

The second reason why we find it difficult to admit when we're wrong is the EGO.  The EGO needs to defend its self regardless of whether it's right or wrong.  In fact it will at times try to crush someone who challenges it, even when it knows it's wrong.  Is this a place to live from?  Is this the way to a more joyful life?  The answer to this, for me, is easy...it's a resounding NO!  Everyone makes mistakes, everyone!!  It's part of us being humans.  I have learned in my life to admit when I make a mistake.  In the corporate world I've been met with shock because I've actually admitted a mistake.  Privately some of these people have come to me & said they wish they had the strength to do that.  But the bottom line is in most business environments it's not acceptable to admit a mistake.

I believe strongly in the opening up of the world where we all can be who we are.  We're all not good at the same thing & the truth is that most mistakes can be easily fixed if admitted when they happen.  Let's move forward together to a more accepting & open world not only in our personal lives but also in our business dealings.

The other part of admitting that you made a mistake is to say you're sorry.  There are two parts to this in my mind; The first is forgiving yourself for making a mistake & the second is to ask for forgiveness from the person or people that were affected by your mistake.  I believe if you truly are sincere with saying you're sorry most people will feel that & you'll be able to move past whatever happened.

Be willing to make mistakes, admit them when they happen & ask for forgiveness to move forward in your life.  This process of accepting yourself as you are will open your life to more joy then you can imagine.

Till tomorrow,

Bill

Quote of the day: "Be honest with yourself & the others in your life.  Admit when you make a mistake, move past it & onto a more joyful life."


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Detachment

Many of us know about the movie "The Secret" or the "Law of Attraction" or as Deepak's book was called "The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success" & we have often talked in this blog about setting your intentions to bring more joy into your life.  This setting of intention is the first step in realizing all your dreams, connect with your soul & create the joy you want to manifest in your life.

The next step, which is often overlooked, is the detachment of this intention.  We've discussed how God/universe only knows to give us what we ask for, but if we stay attached to our request we will manifest that attachment.  Here's an example; "I want more money" is my intention because I "want" the universe only knows to give me more wanting & if I then attach myself to this intention saying I need "xyz" to happen to get more money I close myself off to all other possibilities.

In detachment, we manifest by allowing the universe to create our intention in any way it chooses because we're not attached to the outcome of our intention.  It is in this uncertainty of how the intention will manifest that allows the universe to do its best work.  Thus if my intention is for more money, I would start with something like this: "I have an abundance of resources that continually manifest themselves in my life"  In this intention I first changed the thought from wanting to acknowledgment of continued abundance.  Then I detach myself from the outcome by allowing God/universe to work in anyway it sees fit.  I don't condition this intention by saying my continued abundance is by working at this job or winning the lottery.

Detachment is the only way an intention will manifest.  It's letting go of control to allow the universe to work.  The final part of manifesting this intention is to believe it on a soul level.  Many of us can say we have abundance in our lives but deep down we have fears of having enough money to pay the bills.  The only true way to manifest what you want is believe it in the deepest part of your soul.  To begin with, saying the intention over & over again is a great way to start.  You can often actually convince yourself of your intention if you continue to repeat the words to yourself, at some point you may actually believe yourself.  But, the easiest way is to put yourself into a quiet place & connect to your soul. Then realize in this quiet reflection that you've always had abundance.

Detachment is a difficult lesson & as we discussed in the blog on control, in this world it's even more difficult to let go.  Letting go of your intentions will alllow miracles to happen!

Till tomorrow,

Bill

Quote of the day: "Detach yourself from the outcome of all your intentions & manifest the joy you're looking for today!" 


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Being Yourself

We've talked a lot in the last few months about change.  Being the change in the world & changing your life to bring more joy into your life.  We've also discussed the steps to follow to reconnect with your soul & your divine purpose.  The challenge we all face in this fast paced world is being true to ourselves.  There is a great deal of pressure in this world to be what others want us to be...."The perfect employee"....."The perfect spouse" sometimes these pressures are from within ourselves.  We feel we have to be the best at everything or we're not good enough.

Regardless of the motivation these pressures can be a lot to handle no matter how experienced you are at the practices we've talked about in this blog.  The bottom line for me is to be comfortable with who you are.  What does this mean to me?  It means to be able to look at who you truly are & be that person regardless of the pressures & people that are around you.  I know that this is much more difficult then it sounds because it took me many years to feel good about who I am. The first step is simply that, be comfortable with who you are. 

This means taking the time to forgive yourself for all the past mistakes you've made & then accepting yourself knowing you're not perfect for who you are right now.  Once you get past this point then the next step is to feel secure enough with who you are to be that person in any situation.  This can be very tough because we are all social creatures to a large extent & we tend to adapt to the company we have. 

The bottom line is, that as with many of the things we've discussed here, it all starts from within.  Be happy with who you are, let your light shine outward into this great & beautiful world.  It's our uniqueness that makes this world a wonderful place to be.  Let go of the fear of rejection & be true to yourself.  You are a divine creation created by a divine being.  You are loved unconditionally by God/universe for who you are.  Accept who you are & be yourself.

Till tomorrow,

Bill

Quote of the day: "One of the toughest things in this world is to be yourself.  You are a divine creation be a light for the world!"


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Friends

Have you ever thought about the friends in your life?  Do you think your friends bring you more joy?  I think as we continue on our journey to more joy one of the important things to do is to take a look at who is in your life.  I have found that if you surround yourself with positive people it becomes much easier to continue on your own path of joy.

Now I'm not suggesting that you just drop anyone from your life that is not positive.  That choice is really up to you.  We all have people in our lives for various reasons & sometimes those connections go back a long way.  I am suggesting that you take a look at who is in your life & what kind of energy they have.  Several months ago I wrote a blog on Energy & I discussed how everything in our life has energy.  Have you ever felt you were in a great mood & someone comes by to chat with you & when they leave you feel drained & depressed?  It happens to all of us, there are people who feed off of other peoples energy.  They need positive people in their lives to keep them going. 

Energy flows out of all of us & as I discussed in the Energy blog, there have been amazing experiments with water showing the affect we can have on water crystals just by thinking about them.  Without going through all of this again let's just say that we all have energy that flows out of us.  This energy affects everything around us, including other people.  If we want to be a person of change & lead a more positive/joyful life we need to be aware of how the people in our life affect our energy.

As we grow in our joy it becomes easier to stay joyful even when we have people in our lives that drain our energy.  I the beginning though it's important to at least recognize the people & friends in our lives that affect our own energy.  Surround yourself with people who lift you up & make you feel positive & your life will continue to blossom into a more joyful life.

Till tomorrow,

Bill

Quote of the day: "Recognize the energy of everyone in your life.  Surround yourself with people who life you up & you'll lead a more joyful life."


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Vision

Do you have a vision for your life?  Do you truly know what you want?  Many of us think we have an idea of what we want in life, but is what we want truly what we need?  Are we listening to our soul or to our EGO?  These are very difficult questions & as I noted in the blog about EGO several months ago, it's a tough thing to get past.  We think if we get that job or if we find true love that we'll have a joyful life.  This isn't always the case, if our motivation is from our EGO we'll truly never be satisfied.  That's one of the problem with the EGO it wants more & more & can never be satisfied.  It might be happy for a short period of time because it's gotten what it wants but it will never be truly satisfied.

One of the first blogs I wrote about was creating a vision board & taking time to look at it each day & feel the way each picture or word makes you feel.  I have found that if you do this you will begin to manifest many of the things you want in your life.  As I noted in the Vision Board blog, I like to use a bulletin board because it's easy to add new things or change things out as your vision for your life changes.

The thing I didn't discuss in the blog on a Vision Board was taking the time to create a vision for your life.  For me this takes time, I tend to write down the things that I think I want in my life & think about them off & on for sometimes weeks.  I let them get into my head so I may wake up thinking about them.  The next step I take is to try & understand how this thought makes me feel, does it feel right to my gut or soul?

My experience is that if you take the time to feel your way through the things you think you want in your life, you will slowly take the EGO out of the equation.  The things that don't feel right or correct to your gut/soul usually are EGO based & not truly what you want.  In addition what will happen to me is that when I think about something & it feels right to my gut/soul my head/EGO will try to talk me out of it.  The EGO will put up stumbling blocks or obstacles to try & take away what is a true gut feeling.

Why does the EGO do this?  I can't answer for everyone but for me it's because the EGO wants something right now to try & satisfy it.  It doesn't want to wait & work towards a goal.  It wants it right now & it will always want the quick & easy way.  Don't trust the EGO!

Create a vision for your life.  Reflect  on what you truly want in your life & create a vision board with things that will help you bring these things into your life.

Until Monday, have a great weekend.

Bill

Quote of the day: "Take the time to create a vision for your life.  Reflect on it daily & watch this vision manifest itself & you will ahve more joy in your life!"

Courage

Yes, Courage is an interesting word & subject.  Many of us don't believe we have courage of any kind, we live our lives in fear instead.  Courage is a virtue & I believe we all have it within us.  But for many of us we don't believe we have Courage in our life because we ignore our own strength.  It takes Courage to do the right thing everyday.  It takes Courage to stand up for what we believe in.  It takes Courage to change.

I trust deeply in the courage we all have because I know that no matter we go through if we believe in ourselves we will have the Courage to get through anything.  Sometimes true Courage only shows its self when we need it the most.  Yesterday we talked about reflection & taking time to look at the things that are going on in your life.  While you're taking this time to reflect realize the Courage you've had in your life.  Understand that you've made it through & therefore you can make it through anything that happens.

We reflect far to often on our failures in our life.  Our society only looks to success & enjoys pointing out everyone's flaws.  I don't subscribe to this thought.  I believe that any failure helps us to grow as long as we learn from it.  I've been through a lot of things in my life & part of my growth towards a more joyful life is directly due to the mistakes/failures I've made in my life.  I realized that through it all I've survived & sometimes I've even flourished. 

It was Courage that got me through & took a lot of Courage to change my life.  Believe in the Courage you have!  Trust that it's there whenever you need it & know that if you take the first step to change your life the world will open up to you like never before.

Till tomorrow,

Bill

Quote of the day:  "Courage comes from deep within us.  Believe in the Courage you have & change your life starting today!"

Reflection

I've mentioned before how we all need to try to quiet the noise around us & take time for ourselves.  I think this time is very important to be able to reflect on everything that's going on in your life, if you're fortunate to have a friend or a loved one to discuss your thoughts I believe you tend to discover many more things.  Why is this?  For me it has to do with the way my mind works.  I tend to like to discuss things with others to hear their point of view.  This openness tends to lead me to more creative solutions & to things I've never thought of.  I'm not saying this is the answer for everyone, I know that everyone works in a different way.  I can only say that this works wonders for me.

Why am I bringing this up?  Well, as many of you know I went for a drive the last couple of days to see the fall colors in Michigan & just to get away.  Since I've been laid-off I haven't been able to do much outside of the house, we are in a real money conservation mode.  But, we found a cheap place to stay & decided that getting away was important.  This trip gave me a lot of time to discuss things with Heidi & reflect on where to go from here.  That's why I have found this process so important.

Regardless of how you reflect on the things that are going on in your life.  Try to take time often to do it.  The idea behind this is to look at your life as an "outside observer" to reflect on what's going on & discover clues in every part of your life.  This is not always an easy thing to do & finding the time can be very difficult.  Trust me though it pays off in big dividends.  If you are by yourself, I would suggest writing down the major things that are going on in your life.  Then the feelings that surround those things, many times you'll find a theme or a consistent thread throughout these major events & feelings.  Once you're able to recognize the theme you'll be able to clarify where to go from here.  Self-reflection is never an easy thing to do but if you take the time it will pay off in big dividends.  Remember that God/universe only wants to give you what you want, by clarifying the messages that God/universe is sending you, you are able to see what you're truly sending out.  These "true messages" may not be what you think you're sending out but a deep seated believe you've always had.  By paying attention & reflecting on the things that are going on in your life you can start to change the messages you're sending out & change your life to bring you more joy!

Till tomorrow,

Bill

Quote of the day: "Take time to reflect on the things happening in your life. This time of thoughtful reflection will lead you to a more joyful life."

Be the Change

One of my favorite quotes is from Mahatma Gandhi "You must be the change you want to see in the world."  All change comes from within us & I've tried to embrace this idea over the past several years.  I've tried hard to be open & accepting to all people & all religions.  With this blog I've worked hard to do the same.  I've always been very interested in learning about all the major religions in the world & in fact I took comparative religions in both High School & College.  I bring this for two reason one; I believe the more knowledge we have about the other people we meet in our lives gives us the opportunity to be more open.  The second reason is; For me one the best examples of change is the prayer of Saint Francis.  For those of you who don't know this prayer here are the words:

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace,
Where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury, pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
where there is sadness, joy;

O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;
to be understood as to understand;
to be loved as to love.

For it is in giving that we receive;
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.

There are many interpretations of this prayer but to me it's about the Gandhi quote I lead off with.  We make choices in everything we do & if we choose to do the right thing in everything we do the world will be a better place for all of us.  Regardless of your religious belief's absorb these words & be the change in the world that you want to see.  

I believe that by opening up & living from a place of love we as individuals & together as a group can shift the consciousness of the world in our lifetime.  Imagine a world where we live in peace & harmony & all of us work to always do the right thing.  For me there could be no better place then this.

Start today & be the change you want to see in the world!

I hope you all have a great weekend.  I'm taking a drive to see fall colors on Monday & Tuesday so I'm not sure if I'll be able to write this blog (I will try).  Enjoy yourselves & I'll see you soon.

Bill

Quote of the day:  You must be the change you want to see in the world." Mahatma Gandhi 

Finding your Joy

Do you know what gives you joy in your life?  Do you know what your life's purpose is?  I think we all struggle with these questions & some of us take their entire life before they figure out what their true purpose is.  I don't have any easy answers to these questions & if you have been reading this bog for a while you know I don't subscribe to the "quick fix" theory.  I truly believe the more effort you put into changing your life the better your life will be because the habits you develop over time & the practices you follow to keep yourself open & in the moment take work to perfect.

So what gives you joy?  Joy is state beyond happiness, to me joy is happiness on steroids.  There is a true bliss about being in a joyful place & I have found in my life these moments start from the inside.  So many of us are in search of things in our lives.  We believe that everything we are looking for comes from outside our own being.  We think when we find the perfect love or the perfect job we'll be happy & find joy in our everyday.  But I believe that everything comes from within & grows out into the world.  So, to find joy in your life you have to start with joy within yourself.  The next step, for me, is to live in the moment & pay attention to the smallest things in your life.  When you find joy in each moment it becomes easier to sustain this joy throughout all of your life.

This process is not easy, we tend to get distracted & caught up into the noise that's around us.  We don't like self reflection because we don't love ourselves very much.  But, like everything else if you work at it & begin with the desire to change your life, your life will change beyond your wildest imagination.

So what is your life's purpose?  Only you can answer that.  If you work to find the joy in your life your true purpose will be revealed to you.  I believe there needs to be a separation between our "job" & our life's purpose. Not many of us are able to have a job that completely fills us up.  We should all strive to find that "perfect" job but as long as you have balance between your work life & home life you can still find fulfillment through family, hobbies or volunteer work.  I believe that service to others is the quickest way to find your life purpose.  I believe this giving of ones self will bring more joy into your life then you can imagine.  Find a way to give yourself to others & discover what your life's purpose is.

Till Tomorrow,

Bill

Quote of the day: "The joy in life is living each moment to the fullest.  Find the joy in heart & let it shine on the world"

Simplicity

For many years in my life I never truly understood this word.  Oh sure I knew the definition but I mean what it was suppose to mean in my life.  How about you?  Do you complicate your life?  Do you make things more difficult then they need to be?

The truest way to continue to move forward in your life is to let go of needing things, be of service to others & simplify your life.  Yes, it took me years to get this.  I always thought that because I could figure out a way to make something happen, that it was meant to happen.  Sometimes I would go through complex steps to get to what I thought was the final goal.  I discovered that although I became very good at figuring out out to make something happen, that rarely when I got what I wanted did I feel good.  I suppose there could be many reason for this but overall I've discovered that if something is suppose to happen it will happen.  Truly the simplest way is the best way.

This idea is hard to bring home for most people because we live in a complex world where there are many different demands on our time.  The truth is that this idea is very old, if you were to read the Tao many verses talk about finding the simplest way.  Now, this doesn't mean sitting on your bottom & doing nothing (even though at times that can work).  Everything in the universe first takes action to begin.  So taking the easiest/simplest path still requires action but the difference is everything will work together with you rather then you just trying to make things happen.

We are in a world that judges everything by instant success.  If something doesn't work NOW, it's not a good idea. (just look at all the fads we go through or people that become famous for a few months)  This isn't the way of the universe, the universe takes time to act in the simplest way for all.  By simplifying our own lives we can begin to see an easier path to everything we want.  God/universe only knows to give, it doesn't know lack.  So if we keep our thoughts clear and our intentions pure we will find the simplest way to success & more joy in our lives.

Till tomorrow,


Bill

Quote of the day: "Begin to simplify your life & you will discover the natural flow of the universe."

Habits

We talked last week about comfort & becoming comfortable in your life.  Another part of comfort is habits.  We all have habits that we follow everyday, habits can actually be good or habits can also be very bad.  The problem with habits is that they can be very difficult to change.  The repetition of these behaviors over & over again makes change more & more difficult.

I've written in the past that I've always been an advocate of change.  I truly believe that the way to grow & learn is through change.  But I also know that many people are afraid of change.  The truth is that change will happen with or without your participation.  It's a natural part of life, so why not embrace it!

So what habits do you have in your life?  Are there habits that you have that you'd like to change?  Habits take you away from living in the now.  They become so normal that we aren't paying attention to the current moment while we're moving through the habit.  Anything that takes us away from living in the now really shouldn't be apart of our lives.  The truth is though we all have habits.  They are apart of our life that makes us more comfortable & as we discussed comfort is also a dangerous place to be.  But comfort is part of our lives as well.

The good thing about habits are that if we create good habits, journaling, vision board, meditation, etc. they will become apart of our lives & we will repeat these good behaviors.  I've learned that if you actively think about the habits you want to change & replace the bad habits with a good habits within a short period of time you will move past the bad habits.  Now if these bad habits are something addicting like drugs, alcohol or cigarettes it will be much harder to change.  But I believe that even these difficult habits can be changed by replacing the habits with a good habits.  Of course if you have one of these addictive habits I would also suggest getting some help from professionals to ease you through the transition.

Our brains will rewire themselves fairly easily if we work to change the habits we don't like.  New nero pathways start being created quickly & these new pathways will become stronger with only a small amount of repetition.  Do you remember the old adage that if you repeat something (like a name) 7 times you won't forget it.  That's how easy it is to change the habits you want to change.

Create good habits and release the old bad habits.  This change in your habits will lead you to a more joyful life.

Till tomorrow,

Bill

Quote of the day: "Habits can be good or bad.  The choice is up to you, create good habits & lead a more joyful life"

Harmony

In the past we've talked about Synchronicity & Living in the moment, another part of this same dialogue is living in harmony.  We can learn a lot about harmony from nature & paying attention to the balance in nature is a great start.  When you look at your life do things work smoothly?  Is there an ease in everything you do or does it seem to always take a big effort to move onward?

In my experience when we are truly connected to God/universe things flow very easily because there is a natural flow to everything.  In nature everything has it's purpose & everything works together with ease.  Even when there are storms these storms don't last forever.  Nature is always working to get back to a balance.  This idea of balance is something we should all embrace.  To often we push onward even when things don't feel right or we expect that great things will always continue to happen.  Remember that there should always be a balance in life & in that balance there may be times when things don't go as well as you'd like them to.  The thing to do in these times is to examine the message in the tough times.  Just as in nature when things are out of balance we can look at what is causing the in-balance, we need to do the same thing in our life.

Living in harmony takes a higher sense of attention we need to look at everything in our lives & try & find the messages.  As with nature there are always messages being sent to us by God/universe to help us to live in balance.  If we ignore these messages we will become more & more disconnected.  This disconnection will cause us to have more difficult times then if we stay connected & learn from the messages that are given to us.  Live life in harmony so that everything flows with ease.  Take time to examine nature watch the way it works in harmony & learn the messages you need to do the same in your life.

Until tomorrow,

Bill

Quote of the day: "When we live in harmony we have a deeper connection to everything in our lives. Discover the harmony in your life."

Comfort

Is your life comfortable?  Do you have a routine that you're happy with?  I was re-reading Tom V. Morris's new book "Twisdom" yesterday & this quote made me think:"There's nothing wrong with a little comfort to help you relax.  It's always a fine servant, but a very bad master."  I think overall we all enjoy comfort too much.  We have a daily routine that we follow & rarely if ever vary from.  We get up at the same time, leave the house at the same time, spend the same time at work & return home at the same time.  We feel good that things go "as expected" in our day because we all find comfort in this normal routine.

The problem is that if we become too routine in our life we're missing out on so much joy.  We aren't truly living in the moment, we're going through a routine.  Before we know it 10 or 15 years have gone by & we're still living the same life.  It might be a nice life, a life we're happy with but it will never be the life we could have.  I'm not saying you should change everything in your life today & actually even a small change for most people is a very difficult thing.  But, what we need to do is examine our life for the possibilities.  We miss so much going through our routine & if we can just open our eyes to everything around us there's so much that's available that we miss on a daily basis.

Here's an example of how I try to live in the moment rather then sticking to the routine; When I'm on vacation or even when I'm "planning" something for a day.  I make a general plan that we're going to go to x,y & z and in general we'll probably stay 2 hours at x, 3 hours at y, & 4 hours at z.  I'm sure many of us do this but what I try to do is enjoy the moment & enjoy where I am at.  So, if I'm having a great time at x I'll stay & enjoy the time I'm having at x if that means I don't get to go to y & z, that's ok with me.  To me it's much more important to enjoy the time I am having then to stick to a schedule.

This is just a small example of how you can step out of your comfort zone & continue to try & stretch your life into a more joyful/positive life.  Remember that life is lived in each & every moment and although we all need some comfort in our lives, the true joy is found in paying attention to each of those moments & stepping beyond our comfort zone.

Till Monday, have a great weekend!

Bill

Quote of the day: "There's nothing wrong with a little comfort to help you relax. It's always a fine servant, but a very bad master."

Tom V Morris's book "Twisdon" is now available on Amazon.com here: http://bit.ly/oBIVO

Empathy

Over the past few months we discussed Love, compassion, kindness & service to others but the next step to truly grow as a person is empathy.  Do you have empathy for other people?  Do you know what empathy is?  Is there a difference between empathy & sympathy?

Let's start with the dictionary.com definition of empathy: "Identification with and understanding of another's situation, feelings, and motives."  We are all born with the desire to care deeply about other people.  In fact in a recent article I read we begin to show signs of empathy by our 1st birthday & by our 2nd we will actually do & ask things to try & help the person in distress.  So what happens to us?  I believe that many people in the world today are afraid to feel.  They are afraid to get caught up in other peoples problems & it's easier to just not let "others" affect us.

I don't buy any of this.  I have always felt deeply for anyone in my life & I am deeply affected by others when I learn their story.  Empathy is the pathway to a better more joyful life because your emotional connection to others will lead to more & more giving of yourself.  This giving of yourself in return will open you up to receive many more blessings then you can ever imagine.

 Imagine a world where everyone cared about everyone else & because of this we always did what was best for them.  This would lead to a world that was a wonderful place to live!

So is there a difference between sympathy & empathy?  I believe the answer to this is yes!  Sympathy is feeling sorry for another person, which is nice in it's own way but empathy is experiencing the same feelings as the other person.  This deeper understanding of each other and the issues we face is what will make all the difference in the world.

Open yourself to all feelings, your own & all the people in your life.  Be willing to feel deeply & understand where someone else is coming from.  Make the world a better place by having empathy for everyone in your life.  Lead by example, remember what it's like to be a caring child again!

Till Tomorrow,

Bill

Quote of the day: "Empathy is the pathway to a better world.  Allow yourself to feel deeply about others & you'll discover more joy in your life!"

Kindness

I've talked in the past about love & being of service to others but I believe it all starts with kindness.  In this day & age I believe there is a movement throughout the world to be kind to one another.  We all hear about all the "bad" stuff that happens in the world. It's reported more often then ever.  I believe these imagines are of small extreme groups & doesn't speak for most of the world.  The NBC nightly news asked a few months ago for "good" stories to have on their broadcast & they ended up with enough "stories" to fill several years.  We all need to take the "bad" news with a grain of salt & believe in the best in everyone.

The movement towards more kindness in the world really gained steam with the 2000 movie "Pay it Forward".  This movie showed us all the impact of a Random Act of Kindness (RAOK) on people from all walks of life.  I believe strongly in the premise of this movie and I have seen firsthand how a simple act can make all the difference in a person day & sometimes even in their life.

I realize in this tough economy that we all have to watch the amount of money we give away & to a large extend everyone seems to need a little bit of help from Non-profits to our neighbors.  That's why the principal of RAOK rings so true to me because this simple act can be anything & doesn't have to cost you a penny or even much of your time.

Think about the next time your in a grocery store & you see a mother with 3 kids trying to get that bag of dog food......how hard is to take a minute & lift it up for her & put into under her cart.  By doing this you may make her day & by continuing to do these random acts we together can change the world.  The more positive energy we give out into the world, the positive energy the world will give back.  

Many people believe that major changes need to happen to make the world a better place. I believe instead that all it takes is for everyone of us to start being more kind.  I realize sometimes we all run into a "difficult" person & it's hard to be kind to that person.  But if you realize that everyone is a divine being trying to rediscover the love in their soul & their own connection with God/universe, you may even find a way to be kind to that difficult person.

Be the change in the world & discover how your life will change around you.  Start today with being kind to everyone you meet & practice a daily Random Act of Kindness.

Till tomorrow,

Bill

Quote of the day: "Kindness begins with each one of us.  Practice a RAOF daily & make the world a better place!"

Goals

One of the first blog's I wrote was about using a vision board to help focus daily on what you want in your life.  I use pictures & words on mine & I try to take some time everyday to focus on these images.  Along with this vision board you should also create goals and write them down.
 
In general, we are a goal oriented people & I truly believe that this isn't a bad thing.  The downside to this process is that you have to forgive yourself if you don't reach a goal within the time frame you've chosen & you need to make these goals fluid.  These two points are very important especially being fluid.  As you're living in the moment of everyday you may discover other things you want to add to your goals or move away from.  So don't become rigid in your goal setting instead stay fluid & flexible.
 
The way I go about setting goals is a multi-step process for me.  I start with trying to set goals for the day.  These are the things I want to accomplish throughout the current day.  I try to include practical things i.e: mowing the lawn & things that will help me expand & continue to open me up i.e: reading the next chapter in a book. Then I continue this same process for the week & for the month.  I always make sure to include things that will be for me, as well as the things that need to be done.  It's very important to write down the things you're going to do for yourself because these are the things that tend to be left out or cut out first & in fact they are usually the most important things to do.  Then I tend to make a list of long-term goals.  I am very loose on the timing of these long-term goals because I believe that all goals, especially long-term goals, need to be fluid.  Writing these long-term goals down can help you focus on what needs to be done now to achieve these long-term goals.  Every step you take today leads you to a new tomorrow. 
 
Goals are another way to focus your attention on what you want in your life.  By writing down your goals on a daily basis you can continue to lead a more joyful life.
 
Till tomorrow,
 
Bill
 
Quote of the day: "Open yourself to the discovery of your daily goals.  Focus on these daily goals & watch the world open up before you."

Hope

One of the brightest & best qualities we all can have to lead a more joyful/positive life is hope.  Hope has been ingrained into our culture, at least in the U.S. since the very start of our country.  We've talked before about trying to look at everything in your life from a different point of view.  This change in perspective is very important.  But we all need hope to help us find the positive in everday.

So what is hope and where does it come from?  According to dictionary.com Hope is: "the feeling that what is wanted can be had or that events will turn out for the best."  No matter what you're going through in your life or what you've been through in the past.  You need to keep hope.  Things will get better, everything has it's time & even the strongest storm comes to an end eventually.

So, how do we keep hope alive inside of us when things aren't going well?  As with so many things in our life, it starts with ourselves.  We need to take time everyday to think about hope.  Our true nature knows nothing but to be positive & joyful.  This true self (our soul) doesn't know what lack is or doesn't believe in anything negative.  So, if we can reconnect with this divine piece of ourselves we will always know that things will get better.  We will always have the feeling of hope because we know at our deepest level that God/universe will bring us to a better place.

The one drawback to hope is that it can lead us to living for tomorrow instead of living for today.  This is a razor thin difference because if we "hope for a better tomorrow" we may always be looking to tomorrow instead of finding the joy in each moment of today.  So, I believe we should always hope for a better today/now & if you're in the middle of something that doesn't seem like it's ever going to end.  The first step to change your life is to live in the current moment knowing that by believing/hoping that things will change that they will change.  Always keep hope in your heart!

Till tomorrow,

Bill

Quote of the day: "Keep hope in your heart & always believe things will get better!" 

Regrets

"Regrets I've had a few, But then again too few to mention.  I did what I had to do, And saw it through without exemption." No better way to start a blog on regrets then with a line from Frank Sinatra's song "My Way".  So, do you have regrets?  If you could go back 10 years or 20 years, would you change things?

It seems like a nice thing to think about: "If I went back 10 years ago I would do this different & my life would be better." Sound all to familiar?  Well, the problem with this is that there's no way we can go back.  As I mentioned in the blog about leaving the past in the past, I always liked the idea of Merlin in the King Arthur legend.  Merlin aged backwards so he had all the knowledge of his life (the future) as he aged.  Nice thought but not possible for us to do, at least yet.

So what's wrong with thinking about going back & changing things?  Remember that all thoughts have energy & if you're wasting your time on what could have been you're not living in the moment & you're not creating intentions of what you want in your life now.  Instead you're focusing on a negative moment & disconnecting from the energy of God/universe.  This actually can cause you to move backwards in your journey to joy.

I like the Sinatra song because that's the way I've always tried to live my life.  I have a few regrets in my life, we all make mistakes, but I've never focused on them.  I believe we are an accumulation of all of our experiences.  So, if you were able to go back & change something you'd be a different person.  I'm very happy with who I am.  It's taken me a longtime to get here but I'm very happy with who I am.  It's only through my experiences, good & bad, that have gotten me to the point that I've learned as much as I learned so I wouldn't change anything.

So, let go of regrets, heal the past & move onward to live in this moment of this day.  The past, including regrets have no power over you except the power & energy you give them.  Find joy in today & move past regrets!

Till Monday, have a great weekend.

Bill

Quote of the day: "Regrets are only thoughts that hold us back from living in the now.  Let go of your regrets & live a more joyful life!"