Friday, July 31, 2009


A few weeks ago we talked about Synchronicity and being in the flow of the universe/God so that things flow naturally the way they should.  Another side of becoming aware & open to the universal flow is to try & understand energy.  There have been many scientific studies over the years that show that everything has energy.  If you're able to wrap your mind around this idea it's the first step to understanding energy.  These studies have shown that not only living things but everything has some energy & on a very basic level we are all  made up of many of the same molecules, just arraigned differently.

The next step after the realization that everything has energy is to understand that we can feel & affect this energy throughout the universe.  The easiest way to illustrate this, for me, is to talk about people in your life.  Do you know a person in your life who is very negative.  They're always talking about obstacles in their life or they are just always in bad mood.  When you begin to talk to these people you will feel like you're losing your energy & your joyfulness/positivity. In actuality you are, I call these people energy vampires.  They just drain all the good energy out of you because they are so negative that they need more & more energy just to get through the day.

On the other side of the coin we all know people that light up the room just by walking in.  You feel better just have them around.  Their positive energy just flows out of them & changes the mood in the room.  This is the person that we should all strive to become.   You don't have to be a great social person to become this person.  It's not about being loud or overly friendly. These people sometimes don't say anything you can just feel their energy.

So how do we become this positive energy for the universe?  For me it starts with the recognition that there is energy in everything.  The next step is to understand who the people or which things in your life drain you.  Then you need to try & limit the amount of time & energy you spend with these people.  The final step is to live in the moment & be joyful about everything that comes into your life.  To always look to lift yourself & others up.  This sounds like a tall order & sometimes it can be.  We all have bad days or circumstances happen that we have no control over, but for me the truth is that you can continue to work on all the things we've talked about so far to bring more joy into your life. It all starts when you are continually in a state of gratitude.  When you're in this state the positive energy will continue to grow in you automatically.  The hardest part is to limit these energy vampires in your life until you are able to feel their energy, understand their energy & let it go of their energy so it will never affect you again.

Discover the different energies that enter your life & become a positive force of energy.  Affect a positive change in the universe.

Till Monday,


Quote of the day "Feel the flow of energy throughout the universe & influence it in a positive way everyday."

Thursday, July 30, 2009

Wisdom/Maturity & Growth

Although these words don't have exactly the same meaning, to me they're all interrelated.  I was having an interesting discussion with Heidi yesterday regarding this subject so I thought I would write a bit about it here.

My questions begin with Why?, Why does it take us so long to learn & grow.  Why are we so resistant to true wisdom & knowledge when we are young?  I think these are hard questions especially for anyone that has children.  I have 3 daughters who range in age from 29 to almost 16 but I don't think these questions are unique to my children.  I know when I was growing up I thought I knew it all, so I believe this is truly a universal question.  I also know that the growth I've gone through over the past 12 years has been amazing.   I've been able to learn & grow because of the things I've read, the people in my life & the amazing life coaching of Susie Wise-Peterson.  Through this time I've been able to learn some very difficult lessons.  Some of these lessons I've already shared with you, I'm hopeful that we can continue to share and grow together.

My question though is why it takes us so long to be open to growth/wisdom & maturity.  I believe a big part of the reason is our EGO.  I think it takes us years to try and tame the beast that is our EGO & so only after we do can we begin to open up to other possibilities.  I've always liked the stories about King Arthur & in fact I wrote a large term paper in college on Le Morte d'arthur the original story of King Arthur written by Sir Thomas Malory.  In this legend one of the things I've always found intriguing is the fact Merlin the wizard ages backwards.  What a wonderful thought that when we're in our prime we have all the knowledge we've learned throughout our life.

Many people live their life in the past because of this paradox, they fill themselves with what if?  what if I could go back in time & change things?  What if I knew then what I know now?  The real trap is getting yourself caught in this game.  The important thing to always remember is to live your life in the current moment & no matter how hard you try, you can't go back & change anything.  Accept the past for what it was & move forward to the next moment.

Unlocking the key to opening the mind at an earlier age would be an amazing thing.  I think the other part of the equation is experience.  I think it takes life expereince to open ourselves up & that's why we are resistant to wisdom, maturity & growth because we need to learn our own lessons in life.  If you know anything about the Tao it says that everything will come to you when it's the right time & the right situation.  I hope for all of you that the time is right to grow into the pure potential that each one of us has.

Finally, I have one other intersting note at least for me; many of the things I read & learned swam around in my head for years until they truly started to make sense & shift my way of life.  Hopefully reading this blog will at least open your mind to the knowledge that will help you to change.  The change is truly up to you & it will come when it's the right time & the right situation.

Until tomorrow,


Quote of the day: "Listen to the wisdom of the elders in your life, they know things you may need to know, to grow into a more joyful life."

Wednesday, July 29, 2009


Do you have expectations?  Do you set expectations in everything you do?  It's very easy in life to expect a certain outcome & we all tend to do it in almost everything we do.  Expectations on their own are not necessarily bad, but in the universal sense they set as up for disappointment & by setting an outcome the universe works towards that expectation.

So, how do you feel when you've set an expectation & you have the outcome you expected?  For most of us it's nice but not truly joyful because we already decided what will we get out of a situation. For example, if you plan a vacation to place you've never gone to before & set your expectation that you'll have a good time, even if you have a good time is it truly as good as if you'd let go of the expectation & just enjoyed the trip?

My feeling is that expectations only lessen the joy you can feel & if you don't reach the expectation you've set you're truly disappointed.  So, why set them?  Why not instead just enjoy every moment & fully enjoy every experience that you have.  To me expectations are like are like a grade in school if expect an "A" & get a "B" you're disappointed and if you expect an "A" & get an "A" you're not really happy because you've reach what you already expected.

Take time to examine what you expect in your life from all situations you deal with & especially think about what you expect from the people in your life.  Live life in the now & enjoy every moment, celebrate the joy of discovery & let go of expectations.

Till tomorrow,


Quote of the day "Let go of expectations & live life in the moment!"

Tuesday, July 28, 2009


The greatest love we can have for another is true Compassion.  In today's busy world we are desensitized by other people's stories.  There's so much bad news on the TV, Internet, phone & newspapers that we've grown into people that don't feel, period.  We're afraid to feel because we're afraid that once we give ourselves to another or to a situation we won't be able to manage our own feelings.'s definition of compassion is as follows: "a feeling of deep sympathy and sorrow for another who is stricken by misfortune, accompanied by a strong desire to alleviate the suffering.".  Compassion truly is the opening of your heart to another...putting their needs before yours which is as close to unconditional love that we may be able to reach.

Trust me I know it's hard to open your heart, I've been told all my life that I care to deeply about people & I feel their pain when they go through difficult things in their lives. Have I been hurt by people because of this?  Of course I have but I've never changed the way that I am.  I love people deeply & I always look for the positive in any person I comes into my life, if I can't find the positive I try to look at what I need to learn from this person.  I also try & remember that we are all divine beings trying to do our best.  People making mistakes is part of us being human, if we can try & understand where they're coming from, we will grow as a person & the world will be a better place because of our understanding & compassion.

Deepak Chopra wrote this about if compassion is superficial : "When your individual self identifies with the universal self, then it feels compassion for anyone or any living creature. It’s not superficial in the least, because whatever you are feeling compassion for, it is your self that you are feeling. Nothing could be more personal and direct than your own feelings. And it is profound because it is more than sentimentality or emotional involvement, your soul is engaging and recognizing itself in the soul essence of the other. You are seeing yourself and knowing yourself in the life of the being you are feeling that compassion for."

Open your heart to love & compassion, let go of the fear of feeling, instead accept your feelings & grow as a person.

Till tomorrow,


Quote of the day "Allow compassion to open heart & discover what true love is."

Monday, July 27, 2009


I've always been a person who believes that God/universe has a sense of humor.  The reason I bring this up now is that to me one of the most interesting/funny things that happens in life is the reflection of things you need to learn back at you.  Some people become very annoyed by this process but I've always tried to find some humor in it because God/universe will continue to bring this lesson up to you until you learn it & move past it.

There several parts to the idea of reflection, I will try & give an example of each one.  The first example, to me, is the people you meet.  Have you ever wondered why a person in the office or neighborhood or church drives you crazy?  They may have never even done anything to get you upset but there's something about them that you just don't like & you don't know why.  Most of the time this is because of reflection.  This person exhibits a quality of yourself that you don't like very much or are trying to work on,  for example you tend to be a quiet person who wants to be more social & the person in the office that annoys you is loud & very social.  This isn't an easy lesson & it took me a long time to try & look deeper into why I didn't like a certain person.  But for me, I always try to come from the point of "what can I learn from this relationship" everyone we meet in our life is there for a reason & sometimes it's because of the idea of "reflection".  To learn the things about ourselves that we have to forgive, work on or move through.

The second way this works is a little more direct.  You have a problem with anger & you know you do but you can't seem to get it under control.  Well, God/universe will throw situations at you in your life that will cause you to get angry.  This may upset you, understandably, but instead you should be again looking at "what I can learn from this" .  That's why I believe that God/universe has a sense of humor....not always a good one but all He knows is to help you to be a better person!  If the same type of situation keeps reoccurring in your life look at what you need to learn, change or grow through to lead a more joyful/positive life.

Finally, although this isn't truly "reflection" it's worthy of mentioning here.  God/universe doesn't understand "no" all the universe knows is to provide what we need.  So if you keep repeating that I "don't have enough money" God/universe will give you more of not having enough money because that's what you asked for.  This is a very complex final point & it takes a while to wrap your head around it but to use the example above you should say "I have all the money I need" & God/universe will continue to provide you "all the money you need".  This is especially true with your gratefuls & visions board, don't think about lack, think instead about having everything you need.

Thoughts can change the world, watch what you think & try & learn from everyone that comes into your life especially if it's someone that annoys you.  Look deep inside & see what's being reflected back.

Till tomorrow,


Quote of the day "Love the person you see in the mirror & learn from every person that enters your life. Love life & love yourself"

Friday, July 24, 2009

Emotional Attachment

Yesterday we delved into one of the biggest obstacles I've had to overcome in my life, my Father.  What I learned from the experience & the process that I went through to remove this baggage from my life is called "emotional attachment".

What is emotional attachment, for me, the easiest way to explain it is this; have you ever wondered why a song brings certain feelings to you or a movie or a picture.  The reason we instantly fall into an emotional state when we hear a song or see movie or picture is because we attached an emotion with them the 1st time we experienced the song, movie or photo.  This emotion can be good or bad but we save it in our memory & we always go back to it, that's the way the mind works.

So, if we expand this idea to events in our life it's easy to see how we can fall into old patterns quickly.  The proof of this to me, coming from a big family, is that each of my sisters can recite a event that happen when we were young but because it wasn't an important event for all of us, some of us don't remember anything about it.  Yet the one reciting the story can give you every detail still like they were living through it again right now. 

The problem with this is that if we've had difficult things happen to us in our lives, like my Dad saying "You could have done better".  We attach emotions to anything similar that reminds us of those words & instantly you can be pulled down to a very bad place.  It works kind of like this for me; 20 years ago I was fired from a job, I had no idea it was going to happen in fact I did a lot of good things for this place but in my head rather then thinking about the good I did, I went immediately to "I'm not good enough"....."I can never be good enough".  Thus what followed was weeks of trying to get out of this depression that was caused by this "old emotion" which really didn't have to do with the job situation.

The way we get past this is to recognize the emotional attachment & choose a different reaction.  This takes work but the rewards are great because just as the mind remembers the the original event once we re-attach the event to something different the mind will remember the new feeling.  This change in thought is what will help us get past anything that has happened to us in our past.  If we move our "old" destructive thoughts to "new" positive/joyful thoughts we can truly change our lives.

I hope this helps & I hope you all have a great weekend.

Till Monday,


Quote of the day "Find an old thought or feeling, change it to a joyful new thought & you'll never fear the past, again."

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Love Yourself

The response to yesterday's blog was amazing & several of you commented to me that being quiet is something that's hard for you or something you don't like to do.  Because of that I wanted to talk about the struggles I had with being quiet when I was younger.  To me one of the main reasons people are afraid or don't like to be quiet is because they don't like themselves very much, I know that was true for me.

It's important to understand that to give love you need to have love to give & that truly begins with loving yourself & being comfortable with who you are.  For me it took many years to get there, I grew up in a family of 5, I have 4 sisters & I'm in the middle of them.  A lot of pressure was put on me by my Dad because I was the only boy & he wanted me to succeed.  The problem was he wanted it so much that I could never do enough to please him.  I was almost a straight A student, finished in the top 10 in graduating class in HS, was a pretty good athlete, involved in student government, chess team, choir & all the school plays.  But it was never enough for him & therefore I never truly knew who I was or what I really wanted in life.  I stumbled through life until I was in my mid 30's that's when my change began.

I was fortunate to meet Heidi who was very supportive of the me changing some of the things I didn't like about myself.  As I mentioned before the change started for me with reading "The Return of Merlin" by Deepak Chopra.  He is still one of my favorite authors & I own 8-10 of his books.  I've also enjoyed Julie Cameron, James Redfield, Neal Donald Walsch, Gary Zukav & Marianne Williamson to name way too many....LOL

Anyway, my change took time & I didn't really get past my fear of quiet until my Dad's death & the help from my life coach Susie Wise-Peterson.  What I learned is that you have to forgive yourself for the things that have happen in your life.  As I've mentioned before the past is the past & you can't change it no matter how hard you try.  But, if you acknowledge it, forgive yourself or the other person or both & let the pain go you can move past it.  I've discovered that everything in your head no matter how bad, can be change by the steps I just outlined.  It's in that change of thought that you can be reborn to a more joyful/positive life.

Once I resolved the issues with my Dad, I actually loved being by myself & I enjoy taking time to be quiet.  I know the only way for me to continue to grow is to love myself so I can share that love with the world.  The change in me was/is dramatic & I know it can happen for you as well. Continue with me on this "Journey to Joy".

Till tomorrow,


Quote of the Day "Love yourself first, it's the only way to be able to share your love with the world."

Wednesday, July 22, 2009


Most of the topics we talked about over the past month have been very active ways at starting the change in your life to a more joyful/positive life.  I've always considered myself a person of action so that's the easiest way for me to start. But, there's another very important tool to remember & that is silence!  Just being quiet, clearing your mind & listening to your soul is a great way to center yourself & remove all the noise around you.

I never been into meditation, I know it works wonders for some people but I haven't found a practice that works for me.  I instead just be quiet, one of my favorite places to be quiet is in the Smokey's.  Heidi & I try to go down there as often as we can & I love to sit out on a trail or just on the deck where we're staying & just take in the beauty around me.  When I'm not there I envision being there when I take time for my quiet moments, because for me the beauty & quiet just fills me up.

The reason why silence is important is because it slows us down & helps us to refocus our energy.  Life is lived in the pauses, it's the pauses that give life more definition.  Like the the pauses between notes of music.  Without the pauses all we are is action & movement.  Life is made up of opposites without the bad we wouldn't know the good.  I feel this is especially true with silence.

We all live such busy lives & it's hard to take time for yourself but as with morning gratefuls & your vision board please take time to just be silent.  The peace you find in the quiet will lead forward to a more joyful/positive life.

Till tomorrow,


Quote of the day "Live in the moment because the pauses between breaths are what lead you to your next adventure.  Every moment has meaning."

Tuesday, July 21, 2009


To follow up on yesterday & the idea of looking at the world through a child's eyes.  I wanted to talk a bit about the stuff we are taught as we grow older.  There's a song from the musical "South Pacific" called "You've got to be carefully taught".  Here are the lyrics:

You've got to be taught
To hate and fear,
You've got to be taught
From year to year,
It's got to be drummed
In your dear little ear
You've got to be carefully taught.

You've got to be taught to be afraid
Of people whose eyes are oddly made,
And people whose skin is a diff'rent shade,
You've got to be carefully taught.

You've got to be taught before it's too late,
Before you are six or seven or eight,
To hate all the people your relatives hate,
You've got to be carefully taught!

This song has always rung true to me because as I said yesterday a child looks at the world as a wonder.  Everything about it is joyful, the discovery of new things is awesome.

So the challenge as we get older & as we try to return  to that the childlike vision of the world is to "unlearn" all the things we have been taught.  We have to work hard to let go of the negative vision we've been told of the world, as most of it isn't true.  We are all connected and if we all make an effort to let go of the lies we've taught throughout our lives & return to the purity of a child we will be in a better world.

The final part of trying to return to being a child is to find time to play.  Give yourself time as often as you can to rediscover the joy of playing.  Whether it's a sport you like, a game you've always loved or doing something creative, make time to play & you'll fill your soul with joy.  Resist the urge to say you can't make time for play.  Remember small steps create new habits so if you make the time to play you'll continue to do it. 

Let go of what you've been taught, belive that every moment is joyful.

Till tomorrow,


Quote of the day "Open your mind & unlearn the lies you've been taught in your life. Find joy in every moment, be a child."

Here's Mandy Patinkin singing "You've got to be carefully taught"Quote of the day "Find the beauty in everything in your life & your life will be more beautiful"

Monday, July 20, 2009


So I know what you're thinking, What does beauty have to do with living a more joyful/positive life?  Well to me, beauty has to do with becoming more aware of everything in your life.  We all remember the old saying "Stop & smell the roses", well as part of our opening up & being grateful in our lives, is finding the beauty in everything around us.

It can be as simple as appreciating that rose in your garden or on your walk from you car to the office.  Or it can be as complex as finding the beauty in each & every person you meet.  Find the beauty in everything & the whole world will feel more beautiful.  As with everything else we've discussed this shift will have a ripple effect in your life.  Before you know it everything in your life will become more beautiful.

I know this sounds simple & in a lot of ways it can be simple but the truth is looking at things from a different perspective is an amazing way to grow.  I like to think about it as seeing the world through the eyes of a child.  Everything in a child's eyes is full of wonder & that joy is the true appreciation for the joy in their life. 

Getting back to the wonder of the world through a child's eyes & shedding the cynical look we develop as an adult will truly change your life & bring more joy to you.

I've been on a music kick & the song that reveals this truth the most to me is "It's a wonderful world" by Louis Armstrong, enjoy it at the bottom.

Lastly, my original goal for this blog was for it to become more interactive then it has been.  If there's something that's important to you that you'd like me to write about, please feel free to leave a comment here or @ me on twitter @timberwolf123.

Have a great Monday,


Quote of the day "Find the beauty in everything in your life & your life will be more beautiful"

Friday, July 17, 2009


Many of you have asked me how I decide what I'm going to write everyday.  The truth is that I try to stay open & let things come to me.  Sometimes, like this morning, I wake up with the idea in my head.

So the title of today's blog is "Time" & I think it's an important thing to talk about.  Once you start to practice the things we've talked about, you need to understand that although these practice will definitely improve your life.  That with life has it's own flow.  You will still have good times & bad times just as there are different seasons.  These practices will make the fallow times easier but the fallow times will still be there.  Why is this?  Because to appreciate the best, we have to understand the bad.  The song that always said this the best to me (& the one I woke with in my head this morning) is The Byrds "Turn, Turn, Turn"  Here are the lyrics:

To everything (turn, turn, turn)
There is a season (turn, turn, turn)
And a time for every purpose, under heaven

A time to be born, a time to die
A time to plant, a time to reap
A time to kill, a time to heal
A time to laugh, a time to weep

To everything (turn, turn, turn)
There is a season (turn, turn, turn)
And a time for every purpose, under heaven

A time to build up,a time to break down
A time to dance, a time to mourn
A time to cast away stones, a time to gather stones together

To everything (turn, turn, turn)
There is a season (turn, turn, turn)
And a time for every purpose, under heaven

A time of love, a time of hate
A time of war, a time of peace
A time you may embrace, a time to refrain from embracing

To everything (turn, turn, turn)
There is a season (turn, turn, turn)
And a time for every purpose, under heaven

A time to gain, a time to lose
A time to rend, a time to sew
A time to love, a time to hate
A time for peace, I swear its not too late

There is no magical cure to make life always be the best.  But the more you work on the practices we've discussed the lows will be less & the highs will be higher.  It's an amazing thing to be connected to God/universe & the feeling you get being in the flow is incredible.  Continue your work and I'll be here to help.

Have a great weekend, see you Monday,


Quote of the day "Life is full of mystery, enjoy the good & the bad for it's the bad times that make us appreciate the good"


Thursday, July 16, 2009


Ok, it's time to start to deal with the large white elephant in the room with us....LOL.  EGO is a tough subject  and that's one of the reasons I've waited to talk about it.  Everything we do as human beings is influenced by our EGO's.  It's one of the toughest things to realize & even harder to get past.  I know for me personally it's been a hard evolution.  As many of you may know, I spent nearly 10 years as a professional actor & much more time then that in the theatre, so EGO has always been apart of my life. 

Fortunately for me through the personal growth I've done over the past twelve years I've learned to recognize when it's my EGO that's talking.  I usually can get past the immediate need for gratification that the EGO needs to move onto a better place.

So what is EGO, we probably all think we know but one of the definitions I like the best is from Wayne Dyer, Edge Out God that's really what we're doing when EGO is involved.  We are all divine beings created by a divine being & as such we are all connected but as we grow as individuals we start to worry about what "I" want & we move away from our divine nature to satisfy this hunger that is our EGO.  The unfortunate thing is that no matter how hard we try we can never get enough or have enough to satisfy the EGO. 

The EGO has an insatiable desire, it wants more of everything...more recognition....more money....more things.....more friends.....ok I'll stop now you get the idea.  We can never satisfy the why try?  Why not instead move past the EGO!

This is not an easy task.  The first step is to realize that the EGO always talks first & the loudest.  It wants & needs your attention & it will continue to try & get your attention back.  So, for me, I try to acknowledge the EGO & let it know that I hear what it's saying...sometimes that will quiet the EGO enough to get past it.  The next thing I try to do is move onto how anything makes me feel, not in my head, but deep in my soul.  Usually, the feeling of the EGO is an empty feeling.  In your head it my sound good but in your heart & soul it will feel empty.  Feel that true feeling deep inside before you act.

Always try to connect with your true feelings, this one task that with practice will lead you to a more joyful/positive life.  The EGO will always lie to you, your true feelings will not.

Till tomorrow,


Quote of the Day "The EGO has an insatiable desire for everything.  Connect to your true feelings, let go of the EGO & be more joyful." 

Wednesday, July 15, 2009


Yes, just smile!  You'll be surprised at the results.  I'm not much for tributes but last week I watched the Michael Jackson tribute because so many people on Twitter were talking about it.  I expected to watch a small part of it & then turn it off but I actually got pulled into it because it was so well done.  I ended up watching the whole thing.  That even surprised me.

First, I should say that I'm not a big "celebrity" watcher type of person.  I appreciate all  celebrities for their talent and realize that they are just people like you & me, that have their own problems & issues to deal with.  I try hard in my life to treat everyone the same I try hard accept the good in everyone and forgive the flaws/problems.  So what's the point?  Well one of my favorite parts of the tribute was Jermaine Jackson's performance of "Smile" (if I've done it right it will be at the end of this blog).

The Lyrics of this song were written by John Turner and Geoffrey Parsons with the music by Charlie Chaplin.  Here are the original lyrics:

your heart is aching,
Even though it's breaking,
When there are clouds in the sky- You'll get by,
If you
Smile through your fear and sorrow,
Smile and maybe tomorrow
You'll see the sun come shining through- For you.
Light up your face with gladness,
Hide ev'ry trace of sadness,
Altho' a tear may be ever so near,
That's the time you must keep on trying,
Smile- What's the use of crying,
You'll find that life is still worthwhile,
If you just smile.

I've always liked  this song & I thank Michael for bringing it back into my life.  The impact of a smile on someone elses life can be amazing. But the point of this song is the impact on your own life.  When you smile and really try and make the smile genuine it can actually change your day.  I believe this is because a true, because a smile, like a real laugh, comes from deep inside you.  It's a connection from your soul to the world.  That's why a smile can light up a room.  It's a nice easy way to try & feel better when you're down....try it.....Just Smile!!!

Here's Jermaine:

Till tomorrow,

Quote of the day "A smile is a window to the soul.  Smile today & brighten the world with your soul

Tuesday, July 14, 2009


I've always embraced change, in fact I've been called a "change agent" at a couple of jobs that I've had because I'm always looking for a new way to do things.  To me change keeps things fresh & alive.  Most people though are afraid of change & in fact will fight it to stay in their comfort zone.  Are you afraid of change?

Since I started this blog with the intention of helping people to have a more joyful/positive life, I thought it was time to talk about change.  Most people prefer to keep their life in a comfortable routine.  They do the same thing day in and day out & rarely embrace change of any kind.  Change will happen in you life with or without you so why not embrace the change.

The bottom line is that to enjoy a more joyful/positive life you need to make the decision that things will be different in your life.  You need to let go of all the old ways of doing things.  Step outside of your comfort zone and accept a new way of living your life.  Changing your way of thinking is up to you.  As with the "Internal Dialogue" we discussed yesterday, look at the way you think about everything.

Let go of the old arguments, stop making excuses, the only one who can change your life is you!  Be a change agent in your own life and enjoy the benefits.  The universe/God will respond to you if you take the first step.  I welcome you on this path of change.

Till tomorrow,


Quote of the day "With a single change in thought, your life can be more joyful.  Embrace change, today!"

Monday, July 13, 2009

Internal Dialogue

The next step to a more joyful/positive life is to examine your internal dialogue.  What is your internal dialogue?  To me the internal dialogue is your automatic response to some event which normally isn't expressed except in your head.  An example of this might be when someone cuts in front of you in a line; In your head you may be saying....what the hell does he think he's doing?  But you may just smile and let it go.  I'm sure if we all think about it we can come up with several more examples of what internal dialogue is.

What does internal dialogue have to do with being more Joyful/poisitve?  Well, if you've been working on your morning gratefuls & spending time with your vision board and trying hard to do all the steps we've discussed then the internal dialogue is what we need to change.

All the work you've done is starting to change you from the inside out but that first thought or the unspoken word is really your EGO speaking to you. (I think I'll deal with EGO sometime this week) We need to let go of that dialogue.  Realize that the internal voice is the EGO & that it is trying to hang onto the person you use to be or it's trying to get your attention.

How do we change the voice?  This is not an easy thing to do.  The way to start the change is first to understand that it's not truly you that is thinking this dialogue.  Then acknowledge the thought & let it go.  Then after letting the thought go replace it with how you'd like to react or what you'd like to say.  Going back to the example above with the person in line maybe you would replace it with "I'm not in a hurry now & maybe he has someplace that he needs to get to.".  Feel the difference between the immediate reaction (internal dialogue) & the replacement thought.  feel how the positive replacement makes you feel better. 

Over time the internal dialogue will switch from the EGO to your soul/heart and you will begin to feel much more energized & positive.

Till tomorrow,


Quote of the day "Move out of your head into your heart & you'll lead a more positive life"

Friday, July 10, 2009


The greatest gift we have to give as individuals is our ability to love one another.  On our journey to a more joyful/positive life, love truly is the key.  If we act first with love we will always be open to the best result.  Over the past couple of weeks we've focused on some of the things that can hold you back from having a more joyful/positive life but today love is the answer.

I know at times this is easier said then done, people that enter our lives can be difficult at times to deal with.  The key truly is love, if we are open & working on all the things we've talked about you should be in a state of openness & love.  This state of being we keep us all in a higher energy & make loving everyone in our lives much easier.  But, as we work towards this higher state of being we can make the transition easier by staying in a state of love.

What do I mean by a state of love.  Well for me it's not prejudging anyone in my life no matter what they look like or sound like or twitter like.  I give people the benefit of the doubt & I find by doing this that I am blessed in my life by a diversity that helps me learn & grow more as a person. The second thing that I do is try to treat people the way I would like to be treated.  I try to live in an openness that moves to the positive first & thus brings more positive reactions from the people in my life.

We talked a couple of days ago about Synchronicity & I believe that every person enters our live for a reason.  If we act from love we are more able to understand the message they may have for us.  I know you're thinking there are people that you meet just in passing, what message could they possibly have for me.  You'll never know if you don't try & remember that things work both ways.  That bagger at the grocery store may be having a bad day & your smile or friendly "Hi" might just lift him/her up to a better day.  The bottom line is you never know, but if you act from love you give yourself chance at a whole new world.

Love truly is the answer & the more we practice living in love the more joyful/positive life we will have.

Till Monday,


Quote of the day "Love is the key to a more joyful life, open yourself to love & everything is possible."

Thursday, July 9, 2009


One of the best ways to move forward to a more joyful/positive life is through forgiveness.  Forgiveness can be difficult for all of us but I am remind of the old saying "To error is human to forgive is divine."  This truly is the case, when we forgive we move closer to God/universe. 

So what is the stumbling block to forgiveness, most of the time it's our EGO which feels injured in some way by what the other person has done or what we perceive was done to us. Our perception of what someone has done to us is a difficult stumbling block in our lives.  We all, no matter how objective we are, filter things through our own life experiences & perceptions.  When we've been injured deeply, to the point that we have created fear and/or anger we have problems moving to forgiveness because the original issue is brought to the surface.  The person who did or said whatever it was that brought us back to fear and/or anger may not even know that they did something wrong.  Yet, we won't forgive them because it hurt.

The answer to this paradox is to act from forgiveness first.  To always forgive & let the incident go.  This is not an easy process & for me it takes me a few minutes to move past the situation before I can forgive, but forgive I do.  The reason I'm able to do this is because once anything happens in our lives it can't be taken back.  We talked a lot about the letting go of the past & for most of you that probably meant the distant past.  But, in actuality the past is anything that's happened....once it's done it's done and as I just mentioned nothing in this world can change it once it's in the past.  So act to forgive and move to a more peaceful & joyful place.

The final piece of this puzzle is the biggest & that is to forgive yourself.  As with the other person above, no matter what you've done or perceived that you did in the's in the past.  Forgive yourself for your behavior & move on.  Understand that the longer you hold on to regret the harder it is to be in the present & move to a more joyful/positive life.

I realize that this is easier said then done but understand that no matter what happened in your past, what you said to someone or what you did to someone or even what you did to yourself.  You can't change what happened, it's already for you to grow as a person & become more connected with God/universe the only path is forgiveness of yourself.  You are a divine being created by a divine being.......our path in life is to love & return to as close as we can to our origin of divinity.

Forgiveness is the path.

Till tomorrow,


Quote of the day "Forgive one another but especially forgive yourself, through this forgiveness you will find joy."

Wednesday, July 8, 2009


Many of you probably know the definition of Synchronicity but for those of you who don't here it is:
"Coincidence of events that seem to be meaningfully related, conceived in Jungian theory as an explanatory principle on the same order as causality."

Why is this important?  Because as you move to a more joyful/positive life Synchronicity becomes more & more apart of your life.  This has to do with the opening up of your mind & reconnecting with God/universe.  The challenge in your life is to begin to notice all of things that start to happen.  As you begin to notic,these events you will find more & more things will begin to happen. But for now the awareness to the events is the most important thing.

The more you pay attention to even small things like the light changing just as you're coming up to an intersection, the more things will begin to happen.  I add this discussion now because it alone can start to lift you up to a more joyful/positive life.  It's an amazing feeling to be in the flow of the universe & it is the place we all should be on a daily basis.  The problem is that as we deal with our day & our positive energy begins to fade the Synchronicity doesn't happen as easily.

A great book to read to help you understand about the vibration of energy in our life is "The Celestine Prophecy" by James Redfield the journey that the author takes through self realization is a journey we all need to take.  By understanding how our thoughts affect our energy as well as the people we surround ourselves with can take some practice.  The easiest way for me to illustrate this here is this: Have you ever noticed that when certain people walk into a room everyone notices?  It's not because of who they are or that they are better looking then anyone (although both of these things are possible) it's because they have an energy about them that radiates out like the stone thrown into the pond.  Recognize your shifts in energy and begin to understand what causes them.  This small practice along with everything else we've talked about will boost you more then you can imagine.

Till tomorrow,


Quote of the day "Live in the flow of the universe with an open heart & mind & amazing things will happen to you everyday."

Tuesday, July 7, 2009


One of the last things I feel we need to discuss that can hold you back from more joy in your life is anger.  Anger is a powerful emotion & can cause great struggles in most peoples lives.  I personally struggled with it for years & still on occasion I have to remind myself of the tools I use to get past anger.

Anger can be an immediate response but is usually based on past emotional triggers.  Many of triggers, if not all, are based on fears we have.  Fears that we don't let go and resolve become internalized and end up as triggers for anger.  One of the biggest of these triggers in most people is the fear of self worth.  We will tend to react with anger when someone else challenges our knowledge or decisions because we feel insecure with who we are, so rather then caving in because we feel bad about ourselves we get angry & fight to defend what we believe.  This is in an effort to try & give ourselves more self worth.  The problem with this is that even if we end up winning the argument we only end up with short term satisfaction because the base trigger is still there.

So what do I do, for me it's a multiple step process.  First I try to take a breath and realize what I'm feeling & why.  Then I try to realize that the anger I'm feeling has nothing to do with the person I'm talking to, it instead has to do with me.  In the next step I try to let the anger go and relax, I don't have a certain way of doing this, I just try to calm down and listen to the person more carefully.

Finally, after the situation is past.  I try to understand at a deeper level what set me off.  I will often discuss it with my wife, Heidi, especially if she was around when the trigger happened.  For me, this is a continuing process of learning & evolving but the release of anger & the understanding of the triggers are very important to be able to grow into a life of more joy.

Remember, the more you can let go of negative emotions & behaviors the easier it will become to have a more joyful/positive life.

Till tomorrow,


Quote of the day: "Anger is a poison of the soul, let go of the anger & reconnect with your soul"

Monday, July 6, 2009

Giving Thanks

Today after this wonderful holiday weekend, I thought it was time to reflect on our troops.

Have you thought about your freedom?  I think most people who live in this country take their freedom for granted.  Would you be willing to sacrifice your way of living to defend your freedom?  I think most of us would reluctantly fight for our freedom if we were ever invaded, but beyond that we don't worry or think about the cost of freedom.  Part of the reason for this, I believe, is because the draft is no longer around so we assume that everyone in the service wants to be there.  People join the services for a variety of reasons these days & a lot of them join to try & make a better life for themselves & their families. Many of the members of our armed services are younger people that have joined to give themselves the opportunity for a better education.  Still others joined the national guard assuming they would only be used for national emergencies.  Did you know that largest amount of casualties are among our national guard troops.

So on this Monday after the 4th of July do we truly understand the sacrifice these men & woman go through?  How would you like to be told that in two months you were going to be away from your way of life for 1.5 years.....could you adapt?  Well our troops do that for us & our freedom.  They leave their jobs they leave their families & they leave every part of their lives to go & fight two wars thousands of miles away to defend our way of life.

When they return, their life is different.  It's different because of what they've seen & had to deal with on a daily basis and it's different because their lives have changed while they're away.  Why?  because in their absence everyone has to move forward with their own lives.  We do this so we can keep moving forward but we don't realize the impact on our returning troops.  They come home feeling like an outsider in their own life. Because of this many of them can't deal with the changes and end up taking their own life.  Is this what we want?  What we believe is part of the sacrifice of being a member of our armed services?  

I don't believe any of us want this to happen but I do believe that we don't act to help.  So what can we do; First donate time or money to returning veterans associations, Second, if you know someone in your neighborhood that has served reach out to them help them re-engage in your community be their friend.  Third, if you only see them in passing, thank them, give them a smile any small gesture can help to make their day better.

Together we can change the lives of the people around us.  Together we can make a difference in the lives of our returning troops.  Think about what you can do today!  Help the country heal and avoid any further sacrifice.

Till tomorrow,


I wrote this blog from a friends request & out of love & support for our troops.  If there's something you'd like me to write about please feel free to let me know.

Quote of the day: The dreams we dream are all made possible by the people who served our country & paid the ultimate price to keep us free, never forget."

Friday, July 3, 2009

Dealing with Crisis

When we practice the tools we already discussed to make your life more joyful & positive we still have things happen to us.  Life has a way of getting in the way of our joy.  Last night & this morning I've had to deal with a family crisis & it reminded me that we can't abandon our joy just because of things that happen to us.  We must remember that everything has it's time, just as the planet has it's seasons we go through times when things aren't going the way we would like them to go.  This isn't because our practice is wrong, it's because things can't always be "the best" & because we can't control the other people in our lives.

I've talked a lot over the past two weeks about letting go & releasing control over everything in your life.  Remember as much as we find comfort in control we can only truly control two things in our lives; ourselves & our reaction to others in our life.  No matter how hard we try and no matter how much limited success we have with trying to control more, we can never be connected to God/universe until we understand this simple point.

So how do I deal with a crisis; I first ask myself what should I learn from this situation what is God/universe trying to teach me that I need help with.  Second, I try to understand that as much as I love the people in my life, I can't make them change their life.  All I can do for the people I love is love them for who they are and be there for them through whatever they have to deal with in their life.

I think this is an important lesson for all of us.  Don't lose your focus because you've had to deal with unexpected things in your life.  Stay as joyful as you can even in the difficult times & you'll be rewarded with more joy when the time comes.

I'm going to take the 4th & 5th off of the blog.  I'll start back up on Monday.  I welcome your comments or questions either here or on twitter.  I hope you all have a joyous 4th.



Quote of the day "Find the joy even in during the fallow, difficult times for everything has it's time and none of them are without joy!"

Thursday, July 2, 2009


One of the other things that can truly hold you back from more joy in your life is Fear.  We all have fears, most of which are very irrational and have no true basis in our lives.  Dealing with fear is a very complex issue and I can't possible go into all the different types of fears we can have here or how to possibly deal with each & everyone. 

The important thing for bringing more joy into your life or being more positive is that we have to let go of our fears.  Most fears are formulated in our minds and although some have an emotional component to them, it's truly the mind that will lead us astray.  There is a constant battle going on with most of us between our mind/ego and our soul/heart.  As I have mentioned previously the Ego is a big challenge & I will write more about it as we progress in our path.  Let's continue to discuss fear, so the mind creates fear mostly because of the unknown.  We try to rationalize everything in our lives & when we can't do that or we don't know the answer, we tend to create fear.

The biggest fear in the journey to joy is the fear of the unknown.  Part of "letting go" & connecting with God/universe is to embrace the unknown, knowing that when we are connected we will be taken care of even if we don't know for sure where we are going.  To some extend this goes back to control, which we have talked about before.  People tend to try & over control their lives and this act alone will disconnect you from God/universe. 

We as humans believe we always know what's best for us.  The truth is our ego thinks we know what's best for us but in actuality we don't.  The battle that goes on between the head/ego & the heart/soul is complex.  The point for today is to understand that the fear of the unknown is holding you back from a more joyful life.  Fear is one of the strongest negative emotions we have, so to move past it we need to understand why the fear is there, accept it and move on.

Understand that by embracing the unknown and knowing that we will be taken care of.  We can move forward to a more joyful/positive life.  The universe/God only wants to bring us what we want by letting go of fear we clarify our path so the universe/God can bring us to joy.

Till tomorrow,


Quote of the day "Fear is our head getting in the way of our heart.  release fear and find the joy in your heart."

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Living for Today

I know it's a bit cliche, people use it all the time but what does it really mean?  I think it means different things to different people & there are many more cliche's like "stop & smell the roses".  For me it goes hand in hand with the letting go message we talked about yesterday.  Why? Because in order to live in the present moment you need to detach yourself from the results that you envision.

I'll go much further & say that you have to stop living your life for tomorrow.  The easiest way for me to explain this is an example like this:  You have a vacation planned in a month, it's something you need because you've been working very hard & it's a place that you love to go to.  So for the next month everyday all you can think about is getting to that vacation thus you aren't really present in the whole month between making the vacation plans & when you getaway.  So you lose a month out of your life....we'll who knows what joy you could have found in that month if you had lived each day between the planning & the actual vacation.  Life is about those moments because you never know who you'll met or what experiences you can enjoy in any particular moment.

Another great example of not living in the moment is always saying that my life will be better when.....  When we move, When I get that promotion or When I get married.  It's so easy to always think that the next big thing is what's going to get us where we want to go.

I propose, instead that if you open up & let go of your attachment to the outcome of things in your life that each day will become a new adventure.  Each moment will be something you treasure and in response to your opening up & living each moment the universe/God will respond by bringing you more & more wonderful things into your life.  You never know where life is going to lead you & the next person you meet may be the person you've needed to meet for a longtime...they could be your next boss or the best friend you've been looking for or so many other your heart and allow the joy of each moment into your day today.

Till tomorrow,


Quote of the Day "The joy you discover in the unexpected is the most fulling joy you can imagine"